10 posts tagged “quotes”

"Go for bitchy!"

... I think I'll put this into practice today and see if it yields a mogul for a husband.  I'd date Russell Simmons, by the way.  I'm not kidding.

9AM Mom's No Miracle Worker
Mom, as toddler runs into doorway: Look out, Helen Keller!

E Hadley Road
Indiana

Overheard by: Amanda
via Overheard in the Office, Apr 15, 2008

*Note to self:  Start calling people Helen Keller. 

My coworker from one room away singing obnoxiously:  Apple Bottom jeannnnnns / Boots withuh furrrrrrrrrrrr .. hey, what *are* Apple Bottom jeans anyway?  Do they make your bottom look like an apple?  Wait, why would you want that?

Probably not as idiotic now that I played stenographer and typed it out, but still .. this place makes me have a headache.  She's one of those 27 year olds trying to hold on to her twenties rather than moving gracefully into her thirties.  Kill me. 

Random Teacher:  My friend was thinking about dating this guy who worked at a zoo.  I told her, 'He's sure to be a keeper!' HA HA HA HA HA

Knee slapper.  For realz.

"Let me just say this .. if you're 70 years old and you're tryna go to Alcoholics Anonymous, why not just rock it out, y'know?  I mean, fuck it." -  my friend's analogy to why he will not learn how to type correctly

Also, can I just note that we're so nerdy that we got drunk on (bad) white wine and decided the best (best!!) thing on television was the Democratic debate.  I love my life.

The Uncontrollable Urge to Enter Other People's Conversations, for Instance
Guy to girl: Hey, remember when my grandfather went through that phase where he wanted us to be Jewish?
Passerby: It's overrated.
Guy: ... What?
Passerby: Being Jewish -- it's overrated. There's a lot of baggage.

Public Gardens
Boston, Massachusetts
via Overheard Everywhere, Jan 26, 2008

Student 1:  "He's illegally blind."
Students 2, 3, 4:  "....?"

Me:  I'm exfoliating my life - I love it.

Whatever, Mr. "Bolivia Is a City in Spain"

Young girl: I'm bored.
Father: Okay, let's play the state name alphabet game.
Young girl: Yay!
Father: Okay, here we go -- A?
Young girl: Alabama!
Father: Good. B?
Young girl: Bolivia!
Father: No, that's a city in Spain. Try again.
Young girl: ... I can't!
Father: That's because there are no states beginning with B! Ha! Gets you every time! Okay -- C?
Young girl: Carolina!
Father: Eh, I shouldn't really give you credit for that... but I guess this time... D?
Young girl: Dashwood!
Father: Dashwood?! What the fuck is Dashwood?! This game is over.

Overheard by: CPC

via Overheard in New York, Jan 6, 2008

Gilmore Girls ...
"Just remember you're sleeping with everyone he's ever slept with." - Rory, about sex with a new partner.

I *will* be saying this in the near future.  Twice.